more pink than blue
“Perhaps I could interest you in a Mango barfi as you head out on your (fuckin’ wicked) Indian safari? You’ll want to keep up your strength, as I hear the lions and tigers are quite ferocious here in India.”
Elephants, atomic wedgies and monkeys. Original post here.
Hi, I changed my mind again. I don’t want to re-post every India entry again, so you’ll have to live with the links. I will, however, include a new picture when I can to jazz things up a little.
We started our Mumbai tour down at the Gateway to India, by the Taj Hotel. Read all about the tour, and how we can be assholes anytime, anywhere, here.
Originally posted here.
::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
On our second day in Mumbai, we went on a tour, which was lots of fun. I don’t have enough time to type up the details yet, but here’s a taste, via a couple of our conversations:
walking past a street vendor selling watches, clocks, etc.:
vendor: Hello ma’am, ma’am? I have a huge clock.
me: heeeee ha ha ha
jeff: <apu voice> no thank you, I already have an enormous clock.
me: ya right.
jeff: shut up.
: : : : :
me: heeeee ha ha ha
jeff: why are you laughing?
me: the guide said that this is called the Hanging Garden because unemployed people come here to hang out…
jeff: no. he said unemployed people come here to hang themselves…
me: …oh.
: : : : :
coming out of the restroom at the ghandi house/museum:
me: I peed in Ghandi’s house!
jeff: oh.my.god.
me: what? do you know anyone else who can say that??
jeff: no, and you should totally change your messenger name to that.
me: awesome!!
: : : : :
at a restaurant, having a late lunch:
me: could I have a diet coke please? in a can?
server: 4 o’clock.
jeff & me: <blank stare>
me: diet coke? in a can?
server: oh diet coke ok ma’am <walks away>
jeff: <apu voice> hellloooo? what time is it please? in a can?
me: <laughing hysterically>
(ps, in the restaurant again? Staring Lady. I shit you not)
Okay, I’ve been told that some of you are too lazy to CLICK A LINK, so I should re-post the India stories in new posts, so here you go LAZY BONES. Originally posted here.
After attempting to sleep off the jet lag, we headed down to the Gateway to India:
We were approached by a holy man who gave us sugar pills (we assume) and tied string around our wrists.
I’m not sure what it meant either. Oh, also I got a “dot”.
As we were sitting there, looking around and yapping, we realized that to our left (where we’d walked in) there were hundreds and hundreds of people…and yet not a soul where we were sitting.
“uhh…are we allowed over here?”
So we left. We walked around a bit and tried to find another hotel because ours was quite expensive and we planned on being in Mumbai for about a week, but everything was fully booked.
We stopped at the Hotel Harbour View for a drink, thinking it would be cooler on the rooftop deck. Wrong. It was 1,432 degrees up there (Celsius).
The hotel had a dinky, tiny elevator with an old fashioned gated door where you can see the floors pass. Jeff and I are both really claustrophobic, so it was great when Jeff said “I guess this gate doesn’t even need to be closed” and yanked it open. We stopped – in between floors. One point two seconds of sheer terror. We looked at each all “AAAAAAAAAHH!!” and he quickly threw the door closed again. Thankfully it started up again right away. Idiot.
We walked exploring for a while after that and found the “travelers’ area”, much like Khoa San Road in Bangkok. We sat down and had a bite to eat at Leopold’s (so! good!) and watched people and life in Mumbai for a while. (Guess who is sitting at the next table? Wonky Eyed Staring Lady from the plane…weird).
We went back to our hotel for a nap and ended up staying in for the evening – jet lag’s a bitch.
